life changes

The first thing i have to do is figure out why i don't want to get out of bed in the mornings. i can understand on cold or rainy days, but now, even on weekdays when the sun is coming up over the gulf, or weekends when the sun is already shining with all its might, i hate the thought of getting out of bed. What i need to figure out is why.

more on #3

The next thing is to figure out how i can again become addicted to my drug of choice. i was doing very well using the bike for exercise until the horrid spitting incident. Now i can't get motivated to ride again. It's too cold to swim in the pool. Those are the two of the three forms of physical exercise i truly enjoy. i need Master's help with the third, and that has not been very forthcoming lately.

i am out of school for about 45 days, til Feb 14. i need to find something to do to get the endorphins pumping again. i crave that rush, i am not on the right track with it again and i don't know how to go about getting back on. i say to myself when i go to bed at night, tomorrow i will ride. Tomorrow comes and i can't drag my butt outta the sack. i feel i'm doing good if i don't ask Master for extra sleep-in time. What is wrong with me?