(no subject)

i am feeling evil today. Master has started playing Christmas songs already. i am not into this holiday and certainly not into it this early. i buy presents for my family, actually i did that this summer while i was home. i like giving things to my family. They know, however, not to send anything over here to me. The closer it gets to Christmas day, the blacker my heart gets.

Master has already begun talking about the people we will invite over for dinner on Christmas day. i don't want to do this. i don't want to set up the Christmas tree and have those smarmy holiday items setting out all over the place. i don't mind having a day off, who does mind that?, but i don't want to pretend i am celebrating some joyous, pious, holy event. i'm not. i don't want to work myself sick and achy to prepare a traditional meal for people i don't really care about one way or the other.

i think there is some syndrom or disorder that afflicts people during the 'holiday' season. i think i have already begun to show the symptoms. i want to get Master a gift, but not a Christmas present, just a gift, maybe two. i don't want Him to get any for me. Perhaps i'm related to the grinch. But i don't want to steal Christmas, i just want it to disappear off the face of the earth. i should not have been allowed to be near people. i should have been a hermit.