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Nov. 17th, 2002 08:16 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jdmkleinWe took the dog up to see the new apartment this afternoon. Boy, did he get a nose full. And now i am all nervous. Master has all sorts of plans for the new place. i know most of them won't be done before we move in, and i can't stand living in a mess. i don't like clutter, and untidiness. We are losing cupboard space in the kitchen. He has always had enough kitchen stuff to fill two kitchens, with some left over. There are items in the kitchen that have not been used since He and i have been together, but He gets all dominant acting when i suggest we get rid of them.
We were talking last night about the possibility of Him leaving, and could i afford the new apartment on my own. i said i could always move back onto campus, i don't have that much stuff, even with the things i've bought since i've been here. He said if He went back He would only take a few things, tools, computer, clothes. i said He'd better take what He wanted because i probably wouldn't keep most of the things. i have no need for two televisions. i have no use for table ware for 24 and service for 24 and glasses for 24 . i am short and for the past 4 years i have opened kitchen cupboard doors with much fear and trepidation. i never know when something is going to fall out and land on my head or toe because we just have to have three tins of saltine crackers and four boxes of oatmeal. i can't get into the maids room to get anything because there are three tool boxes and a book shelf full of tools and a clothes hamper that is broken, but 'might be used some day'. i'll just open the balcony door and sweep it all out if He leaves. i don't think He liked me saying that but it's the truth. For two reasons. i don't want all that 'stuff' and having it around would remind me of Him too much.
i wonder why i have this thing about possessions? i am minimalist. i need enough to live, and nothing more. Maybe i could conspicuously consume music cds, but other than that, why have it if you can't use it? just having stuff sit around to get dirty and have to be dusted is not my idea of good life. Having something and keeping it storage is also not my idea of neat. If i have beautiful things i want to see them, not save them for my heirs. What is my allergy to stuff?
We were talking last night about the possibility of Him leaving, and could i afford the new apartment on my own. i said i could always move back onto campus, i don't have that much stuff, even with the things i've bought since i've been here. He said if He went back He would only take a few things, tools, computer, clothes. i said He'd better take what He wanted because i probably wouldn't keep most of the things. i have no need for two televisions. i have no use for table ware for 24 and service for 24 and glasses for 24 . i am short and for the past 4 years i have opened kitchen cupboard doors with much fear and trepidation. i never know when something is going to fall out and land on my head or toe because we just have to have three tins of saltine crackers and four boxes of oatmeal. i can't get into the maids room to get anything because there are three tool boxes and a book shelf full of tools and a clothes hamper that is broken, but 'might be used some day'. i'll just open the balcony door and sweep it all out if He leaves. i don't think He liked me saying that but it's the truth. For two reasons. i don't want all that 'stuff' and having it around would remind me of Him too much.
i wonder why i have this thing about possessions? i am minimalist. i need enough to live, and nothing more. Maybe i could conspicuously consume music cds, but other than that, why have it if you can't use it? just having stuff sit around to get dirty and have to be dusted is not my idea of good life. Having something and keeping it storage is also not my idea of neat. If i have beautiful things i want to see them, not save them for my heirs. What is my allergy to stuff?
