a difficult write
Jun. 19th, 2002 08:38 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jdmkleinWoke Master up this morning for breakfast and had goose bumpy aerobic hot sweaty sex. i like that very very much.Wish it could happen more often, but now that we have the 'wee one' we don't wake up together. The bad thing about 'wee ones'.
Did my swim.
Jade wrote the list asking what 'going especially well' feels like. i had some trouble with that. Then i realized it feels normal. It would be easier for me to answer what 'going especially bad' feels like. Tobie wrote about separating life d/s from bdsm d/s. That's not something i can do.
My life is good, and i am exceeding happy with where i am in it. i have a good job, it has it's ups and downs, but on the whole the ups are more than the downs, and even when it's normal, it's very good. i am very lucky that i have a profession i love, and a job that i am good at and enjoy doing.
My life with Master is also good. There are also ups and downs. But again on the whole the ups are more and much higher than the downs. i asked Him the other day if we were soulmates. He said maybe not. The dictionary says soulmates are tempermentally suited to each other. He said He knows He has some excentricites that drive me up the wall. And that's true, but i believe our temperments are uniquely suited to each other.
Because of that it's easier for me to submit to His will. Not that i can always do it with ease, but even the tougher times are easier i think than if we weren't so well matched. i am able to commit myself to Him. And that is something that hasn't happened ever. i am willing to work for our relationship. And it is hard work.
i had been queen of my world for a long long time. Becoming slave in His world is a major adjustment. i think back to every other relationship i have had and i realize one of the main causes for their failure is that i wasn't willing to do my share to make the relationship work.
i'm not sure how the dynamic is different, well yes i am, and now that i'm thinking about it, i wonder if i had had the opportunity to be allowed in this position with George, it might have worked. Or with Robert, that one didn't last long enough but i think if i had been available a bit long for him, it might have worked.
Did my swim.
Jade wrote the list asking what 'going especially well' feels like. i had some trouble with that. Then i realized it feels normal. It would be easier for me to answer what 'going especially bad' feels like. Tobie wrote about separating life d/s from bdsm d/s. That's not something i can do.
My life is good, and i am exceeding happy with where i am in it. i have a good job, it has it's ups and downs, but on the whole the ups are more than the downs, and even when it's normal, it's very good. i am very lucky that i have a profession i love, and a job that i am good at and enjoy doing.
My life with Master is also good. There are also ups and downs. But again on the whole the ups are more and much higher than the downs. i asked Him the other day if we were soulmates. He said maybe not. The dictionary says soulmates are tempermentally suited to each other. He said He knows He has some excentricites that drive me up the wall. And that's true, but i believe our temperments are uniquely suited to each other.
Because of that it's easier for me to submit to His will. Not that i can always do it with ease, but even the tougher times are easier i think than if we weren't so well matched. i am able to commit myself to Him. And that is something that hasn't happened ever. i am willing to work for our relationship. And it is hard work.
i had been queen of my world for a long long time. Becoming slave in His world is a major adjustment. i think back to every other relationship i have had and i realize one of the main causes for their failure is that i wasn't willing to do my share to make the relationship work.
i'm not sure how the dynamic is different, well yes i am, and now that i'm thinking about it, i wonder if i had had the opportunity to be allowed in this position with George, it might have worked. Or with Robert, that one didn't last long enough but i think if i had been available a bit long for him, it might have worked.
