Jun. 27th, 2004

Are you happy?

i don't believe that happiness is a sustainable emotion. i know that  there are times when i am happy.And i wouldn't want it any other way. There would be nothing to look forward to, or anticipate if happiness were a constant state of being.

i believe that i am content with my life.  i like where i  am (both literally and figuratively), who i am,  and what i am.  Some times are better than others. Walking out of the class room after a kick-ass class, knowing that i have facilitated the acquisition of knowledge for a group of young men and women, is a happy moment for me. Seeing the love in Master's eyes as He looks at a photo of His only grandchild is a moment of happiness for me. Hearing my daughter's giggle of joy when she has finally mastered something others would not expect a handicapped person to be able to do is another example of a happy time for me. My son's noticeable pride in his family, his wife and their two children,  is yet another example of something that makes me happy. Thank goodness for those times, they counterbalance the tough ones. And right now the going is pretty tough. However, there is little about my life that i would change.

i like the expectation/anticipation of a happy moment, or day, or period of time. i enjoy the happiness as an added benefit in my life and when it is over, i know there will be another to follow. i know that there will be another kick ass day in the classroom. i know that something Master says or does will fill my soul with happiness. i know that my family will reinforce the feelings i have for them and by doing that offer me other moments of happiness. i know that i will do something  to someone, or for someone at some time and have the knowledge that in doing so, i will feel some moments of happiness.

i also believe that even though happiness is not sustainable it does not mean that the rest of the time i am unhappy. i don't believe happiness and unhappiness are polar opposites. i believe that contentment is a goal to strive for in life, and happiness is a bonus. i am content. And i get many bonuses.


The time it getting closer, but it appears Master won't be going to Basra until after July 5. He has to go to Baghdad still, but can't go there now, until after July 5, because the country is closed for the gov't handover. Next Monday will be the middle of the summer semester. The way it is going now, i may be back in the states before Master gets to iraq. He got His new company car today, 2004 Toyota Prado. It has an altimeter and a five disc cartridge for the cd player. The catrtidge i can understand, but the altimeter? The whole of Kuwait is less than 100 feet above sea level. It is a puzzlement.

Max is free and clear. The papers are signed and returned to the man he bit. No one at the animal control center can understand how it happened. Apparently Maxwell P. Dogg was on his best ever behavior every time he was there. The vets all commented on how well trained he was. Personally? i think Max is a magician dog. He turns into well-trained dog when he's in public, and loveable silly-butt mutt when he's home. He has his registered for obedience class in September, and has his room reserved at the Kuwait Doggie Hilton for August and the first two weeks in September. Stuff is good with shau dog.

i have been asked if i want to tutor this summer. i'm debating. i really don't like to tutor, but it is good money. And it would be some way to pass the time after Master leaves. i will have to think on it some more. i suppose i will call the parent and ask what is expected and then see if D wants some more summer work. i know he is running a little tight until the summer school money is in.

It is trying to blow up a storm again. And i have a headache. Those two things seem to coincide quite often. i didn't sleep well last night and am fighting to stay awake until 10:30 so i can sleep tonight. It's not a migraine, the headache, but i can't knock it with regular pain relievers. i don't want to use the migraine meds, i think it's a stress headache. i've started the B complex again, this time a different brand. The B complex i was taking left a metalic taste in my mouth. i also asked Master if He would pick up some St. John's Wort. i started a regimine of that yesterday. i think i could tell a difference already if i didn't have this darned headache.

i'm rambling and my thoughts are becoming disjointed.

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Julia Klein

June 2024

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