![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Feb. 27th, 2003 08:23 pmMaster has an anniversary next week. March 5 He will be in Kuwait 12 years. He came into Kuwait 5 days after the liberation of Kuwait from the Iraqi invasion. He was in Saudi during the war. He began His time with the Kuwait Airforce working on their planes during the war. The next time He will be working for the KAF from Dubai.
Max got hit by an ATV today. One came by him on the run, he took off after it, and wonder of wonders caught it. He came around head first into the ATV. He got hit on the left back thigh. Didn't break any bones or get cut or anything like that, but i'm sure he has a bruise. He doesn't seem to be favoring it or anything, but we shall wait until tomorrow and see what happens. If he shows any signs of pain i'll give him half an aspirin. He does take pills well.
It seems to me that another week will soon be gone with no pain for me. He keeps talking about it, but not doing anything. Is this what is known as a mind fuck? Something has to happen soon.
Since our anniversary i've felt myself becoming much more service oriented. It is difficult to do, because He does so much for himself. When i ask if He wants something He says He can get it himself. Sometimes it almost seems like an argument to get Him to allow me to do things for Him. i've also found myself picking up after Him. It seems i'm becoming His mother, putting things away for Him. I've decided it's easier to just follow around after Him putting this or that away or back where it belongs, than listen to Him moan and groan and piss and rant about where something is. He doesn't notice. Perhaps it is too soon. i'm not about to ask Him. It should not be my place to draw His attention to what i do. i have found myself biting my tongue more often and harder. i am not sure all is well between us. We get along fine, we enjoy each others' company, i have strong feelings for Him, He says He loves me, yet i feel something is missing.
Am i asking for too much? Am i expecting too much? Maybe now is not the time for these thoughts to be coming to the front. i am close to being afraid. There is so much going on. Am i changing maybe growing in another direction? Is it just the lack of pain that is making me think this way or is there something more lacking? Questions i have been trying to answer.
Max got hit by an ATV today. One came by him on the run, he took off after it, and wonder of wonders caught it. He came around head first into the ATV. He got hit on the left back thigh. Didn't break any bones or get cut or anything like that, but i'm sure he has a bruise. He doesn't seem to be favoring it or anything, but we shall wait until tomorrow and see what happens. If he shows any signs of pain i'll give him half an aspirin. He does take pills well.
It seems to me that another week will soon be gone with no pain for me. He keeps talking about it, but not doing anything. Is this what is known as a mind fuck? Something has to happen soon.
Since our anniversary i've felt myself becoming much more service oriented. It is difficult to do, because He does so much for himself. When i ask if He wants something He says He can get it himself. Sometimes it almost seems like an argument to get Him to allow me to do things for Him. i've also found myself picking up after Him. It seems i'm becoming His mother, putting things away for Him. I've decided it's easier to just follow around after Him putting this or that away or back where it belongs, than listen to Him moan and groan and piss and rant about where something is. He doesn't notice. Perhaps it is too soon. i'm not about to ask Him. It should not be my place to draw His attention to what i do. i have found myself biting my tongue more often and harder. i am not sure all is well between us. We get along fine, we enjoy each others' company, i have strong feelings for Him, He says He loves me, yet i feel something is missing.
Am i asking for too much? Am i expecting too much? Maybe now is not the time for these thoughts to be coming to the front. i am close to being afraid. There is so much going on. Am i changing maybe growing in another direction? Is it just the lack of pain that is making me think this way or is there something more lacking? Questions i have been trying to answer.
