(no subject)

I took the Inner Dragon online quiz and found out I am a Blue Dragon on the inside. If there ever was a draconic example of a supple attitude, my Inner Dragon is it. Blues are the Water Elemental dragon - typified by their Steam breath weapon. Pretty creative, huh? It goes right along with my Inner Dragon's tendency to maim, but not destroy. Much like my native oceans and rivers will deform the rock over time, eventually wearing it away to nothing.

Humans shouldn't make the mistake of thinking I'm weak, however. After all I'm a good 30 feet in length and have a penchant for materializing out of any body of water, no matter how small. I also enjoy communicating with aquatic life-forms, hunting in totally inhospitable terrain (i.e. 3000 feet below the waves), and using my fluid nature to my advantage. My enemies probably won't even see me approach in the first place. My favorable attributes are the sunset, Autumn, water, compassion, intuition, and calmness. Naturally, I pity the fool who'd try and prove that calmness part, he'd probably wind up being scalded. *small grin*

the bdsm community--what the fuck is it?

There is something that's been running around in my brain trying to get out. It's this whole idea about BDSM community.

The lists i read have lots of writing about being members of this community. i am beginning to think it is a lot of bull. i'm not saying this right, but i've got to try to get my head around it.

i forget what list, but someplace there is a lot of writing about how to make the community more accessible to the newcomers. It seems to me that many of those people who are making the most noise about being put in a box or labeled are some of the same people who are talking about community. Aren't they putting themselves into a box?

They have an odd, in my opinion, take on it. For me, there is no community. This is no lifestyle for me, it is my life. i can no more share the way i live than i can change the color of the sky. i know no other way to live my life.

i am sick and tired of hearing about the bdsm community. The people who believe in 'community' are not living my life. i don't expect them to nor do i expect them to understand how i feel.

It is personal. It is between Master and me. i am not willing to share it, particularly with some of the people i have been reading. For them perhaps there is a community. They play publicly; they seem to jump around from partner to partner. To some it the scene appears to be the 'thing'. The driving force of their relationship. Maybe that's what i find so difficult or odd. Maybe i have to put words to the driving force in my relationship with Master.

He fills an emptiness in my psyche. Without Him i am incomplete. i could live without Him, but it would be an empty life. i could be happy without Him, but there would be a hollowness to it. i would live without Him, but it would not be life, it would be survival.

The life we share is different from nearly everyone else i know, but it is what i need, and fortunately also what i want. i read questions that ask 'what if'. i can't answer them because for me there is no 'what if'. My relationship with Master is built on trust. i trust Him completely. This does not mean i am a simpleton or unable to take care of myself. i am happier living this way than living any other way. This isn't going right yet. But it's getting closer than it has ever been.