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i'm a little bummed. When we got the dsl line, my computer started giving me fits. Master went to the states for 6 weeks and while He was gone, i used His computer. When He got back He worked and worked and worked on my computer but never could get it right. He finally took it to the computer store and the tech said my bios is too small/old i can't remember the exact word, to handle the dsl line. So i got a new computer. And it's a wozzer! Unfortunately i wasn't expecting this to happen, and therefore didn't save any of the files i had on my old hard drive to a floppy. Not that there was much that i really wanted to save, or was important to save. Only two files for sure. My journal, and my manuscript. Master said no problem, we'd just hook up the old drive to the new computer as a 'slave' get it? ha ha ha drive and i could just transfer the files from one drive to the other. Only there seems to be a problem. He connected the drive to my new computer....can't find the files. My new computer doesn't have the FAT32 dealiebop. He thinks that may be the reason the files aren't being read. He has now spent the better part of His after work day messing with my old hard drive on His computer. Something is definitely not right in Mudville, tonight. The hard drive now can't be found by His computer, ergo, no my files either.
The journal is the work of all the years Master and i have been together. It has seen me through some pretty difficult times. It has helped me get my head around what it is and who i am. Now i have this, and i've got some pages that i put on His computer, but those first 250 odd are still floating around in cyber purgatory some place. Master says not to worry, and i'm not, because i know He won't give up until He has done absolutely everything He knows to find my journal.
The other file that is important to me is my next book. i'm not sure i can recreate that. i may have to use the same idea and go about it from a different angle. That work is slow. i agonize over every word i write. i had thought i had about 6 months of writing left to do on it, now who knows?
Which brings me to one of the things i like best about Master. And that same thing that causes me to have fits. He loves to mess. He loves to pooch. He's happy when He's tinkering. He can sit at the table and work for hours on a piece of electronic equipment and in the end have it repaired. He knows just exactly everything there is to know about cars and plumbing and wood work and concrete and cement work and electricity and who knows what all else. And He has the patience to fuss about stuff until He has figured it out.
Eureka, as we very speak! i think He's discovered the hard drive problem. He's been messing with the wrong one. DUH! He finally got the drive open and has decided this is one from the states. i looked around and lo and behold, yes Virginia, there are three old hard drives on the desk, not two. Where the fuck did that one come from? Who knows?
Along with knowing everything about everything, comes the problem of having a whole lot on your mind and getting side tracked in the middle of a project. i'm sure this is what happened with the extra hard drive. He put my hard drive down, not paying attention to it, and when He wanted to work on it, He picked up the first one He saw. When we first met, and were comparing notes i mentioned that i was a neatnik. Not obsessive about tidy, but i like a clean kitchen, and at least a path through the living room, and having the ability to walk around three sides of my bed. Master says 'Well hell, I worked on airplanes for a living. I'm like a doc. I count the tools I take out and make sure I have the same number when I come back. My tool board has each tool outlined.' And i believed Him. HA!
He knows what He has at all times. But He doesn't always know where it is. One of the few problem spots we ever had is Him not putting things back when He's finished. And He doesn't always consider when He's done working for awhile, finished. Therefore, when He wants to work on something else, the right tool is hard to find. There have been times when i have thought this will be the straw that breaks this camel's back.
Right now i can laugh about it, because we think we've found the files. But i would be angry hurt crying if He hadn't discovered His mistake. And i am upset that He let this happen. Not upset in a M/s put Him on a lower pedestal kind of thing.
i feel a little guilty about all that i have written about Him. i'm not sure He will read it or not, or when. He knows how to find this. i don't want to upset Him or hurt His feelings by making Him think i only rant about Him. This is the last i write like this. i know He will understand i just feel uncomfortable about it.
But i'm not going to delete it. That was a rule i'd made when i first started my journal.
On another note.
i took my bike out to the ball park tonight. We left the house early, so i'd have some daylight time to ride. By my calculations i did about 10 miles, in about 25 minutes. Not Tour de France speeds for sure, but who cares? i feel great, nice and loose and well oiled. i'm going to seriously consider riding again in the morning before i go to work. The plan is to get up about 4:45 and be out on the street by 5:00. Ride for 30 minutes or so, and be back with enough time for a shower and breakie before i have to leave for the office. Don't suppose it would be sound planning to ride down to the doughnut shop.
The journal is the work of all the years Master and i have been together. It has seen me through some pretty difficult times. It has helped me get my head around what it is and who i am. Now i have this, and i've got some pages that i put on His computer, but those first 250 odd are still floating around in cyber purgatory some place. Master says not to worry, and i'm not, because i know He won't give up until He has done absolutely everything He knows to find my journal.
The other file that is important to me is my next book. i'm not sure i can recreate that. i may have to use the same idea and go about it from a different angle. That work is slow. i agonize over every word i write. i had thought i had about 6 months of writing left to do on it, now who knows?
Which brings me to one of the things i like best about Master. And that same thing that causes me to have fits. He loves to mess. He loves to pooch. He's happy when He's tinkering. He can sit at the table and work for hours on a piece of electronic equipment and in the end have it repaired. He knows just exactly everything there is to know about cars and plumbing and wood work and concrete and cement work and electricity and who knows what all else. And He has the patience to fuss about stuff until He has figured it out.
Eureka, as we very speak! i think He's discovered the hard drive problem. He's been messing with the wrong one. DUH! He finally got the drive open and has decided this is one from the states. i looked around and lo and behold, yes Virginia, there are three old hard drives on the desk, not two. Where the fuck did that one come from? Who knows?
Along with knowing everything about everything, comes the problem of having a whole lot on your mind and getting side tracked in the middle of a project. i'm sure this is what happened with the extra hard drive. He put my hard drive down, not paying attention to it, and when He wanted to work on it, He picked up the first one He saw. When we first met, and were comparing notes i mentioned that i was a neatnik. Not obsessive about tidy, but i like a clean kitchen, and at least a path through the living room, and having the ability to walk around three sides of my bed. Master says 'Well hell, I worked on airplanes for a living. I'm like a doc. I count the tools I take out and make sure I have the same number when I come back. My tool board has each tool outlined.' And i believed Him. HA!
He knows what He has at all times. But He doesn't always know where it is. One of the few problem spots we ever had is Him not putting things back when He's finished. And He doesn't always consider when He's done working for awhile, finished. Therefore, when He wants to work on something else, the right tool is hard to find. There have been times when i have thought this will be the straw that breaks this camel's back.
Right now i can laugh about it, because we think we've found the files. But i would be angry hurt crying if He hadn't discovered His mistake. And i am upset that He let this happen. Not upset in a M/s put Him on a lower pedestal kind of thing.
i feel a little guilty about all that i have written about Him. i'm not sure He will read it or not, or when. He knows how to find this. i don't want to upset Him or hurt His feelings by making Him think i only rant about Him. This is the last i write like this. i know He will understand i just feel uncomfortable about it.
But i'm not going to delete it. That was a rule i'd made when i first started my journal.
On another note.
i took my bike out to the ball park tonight. We left the house early, so i'd have some daylight time to ride. By my calculations i did about 10 miles, in about 25 minutes. Not Tour de France speeds for sure, but who cares? i feel great, nice and loose and well oiled. i'm going to seriously consider riding again in the morning before i go to work. The plan is to get up about 4:45 and be out on the street by 5:00. Ride for 30 minutes or so, and be back with enough time for a shower and breakie before i have to leave for the office. Don't suppose it would be sound planning to ride down to the doughnut shop.